While I'm generally not a big on the whole "it's the start of a new year" thing, it's hard not to take time to pause and reflect on 2010. It was kinda a big year for the Mavin clan. It's been somewhat of a blur, giving the year the feeling of being both just a passing moment and the longest year ever. A year ago today I would have never guessed today would find us where we are...but here we are.
Yesterday I was chatting with a friend and I was talking about how it's hard to believe it's been 6 months since we moved to Carlisle. I was telling her how I felt like I was still in a period of transition because our life looks so different that I envisioned it would at this point. She kinda looked at me funny...which made me stop and think about what I had just said.
While my comment encompasses more than just where we are physically living, the fact of the matter is regardless of what it looks like, life is happening NOW. Period. I need to do a better job of accepting that fact rather than moaning over what I THINK life SHOULD look like. Relocations happen. Relationships change. (I think this one is the hardest for my heart to come to terms with.) My professional life is going to flex and change...sometimes in unexpected ways. Sometimes life is going to move in the direction we expect, sometimes it's going to take unexpected turns.
Acceptance of the now doesn't mean I can't work towards changing the aspects of life that don't serve our family well. But it also means I need to stop wasting time and energy fretting over what is not...and may never be. It's not an easy exercise for me.
I really don't know what will come to be be in 2011, but I do have a small hope. I hope that through the year I start to feel more settled. More settled in our new community...because I'd like to feel at home in Carlisle for more reasons than just the address of our house. More settled with my place in this world professionally...because as I sit here and type this I'm still quite unsure of what that picture is going to look like in the coming months. More settled as we continue to work find a better place in our financial life...because always being stressed about money is EXHAUSTING.
I guess after 2010, the year of change, I'm craving a bit of stability in 2011.
What are you hoping for in 2011?